How do you measure a year?

Rent Cast - Seasons Of Love Lyrics

COMPANY
525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear. 525,600 minutes - how do you measure, measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee. In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife. In 525,600 minutes - how do you measure a year in the life? How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love. Seasons of love.

SOLOIST 1
525,600 minutes! 525,000 journeys to plan. 525,600 minutes - how can you measure the life of a woman or man?

SOLOIST 2
In truths that she learned, or in times that he cried. In bridges he burned, or the way that she died.

COMPANY
It’s time now to sing out, though the story never ends let's celebrate remember a year in the life of friends. Remember the love! Remember the love! Remember the love! Measure in love. Seasons of love! Seasons of love

Love, I have determined, is really the meaning of life. But, it is not always that simple. Love is complicated and painful. Love is easy and joyful. Love is. People have died for love. People have lived for love. People have killed for love. People have created life for love.

Love is tricky, though. Because generally, you can choose who you are with, you cannot choose whom you love. Life is a never-ending, overlapping, and geometrical connection from me to you to her to him to him to her to you to me. Love is rarely as simple as I love you and you love me. Usually, it is much more than that.

This is the part that makes life interesting and worthwhile. How much do you love? How much do I love? How far would you go for love? How far would I go? Would you move across the world for love? Would you change your job for love? Would you leave your family for love? Would you sell all you own for love? Would you kill for love? Would you die for love? Would you lie, cheat, and steal for love? Would you give up sex for love?

As much as I would like to think I would do anything for love, maybe I won't do that, whatever that that entails. Should we all just love the one we're with since we cannot be with the one we love? With love, there comes a breaking point. How far can you bend until you break?

EPIC Week

This week has been epic...heartage for you all...that is all. :)

Hmmm...

I think I was played in the worse way possible...either that or I've gone crazy.

Deep Desire

my desire for you burns from deep inside
as it drips slowly down my thigh
like ice cream down a cone
just the thought of you makes me moan
i want you so bad
that it makes me feel mad
i want to be
kissing you
touching you
holding you
caressing you
licking you
until
your desire for me burns from deep inside
and it slowly drips down your thigh.

The Dead of Winter

Winter is associated with cold and darkness. During winter, plants die, birds fly south, and bears hibernate. However, when Spring rolls around things literally burst and bloom back to life. Like Nature, human lives are often times intertwined with the symbolism of Winter and Spring.

My life lately has truly seen this. In early November, my 96 year-old great-grandmother Lillian passed away after a long,hard body and mind destroying battle with Alzheimer's and, as we later found out, cancer. Just a few weeks later, my 18 year-old cousin Jenny announced to her family, which worked its way through the grapevine, that she is pregnant. So within a month, my family has gone from death to life, sadness to happiness.

My job cut my hours down, which has given me some additional financial hardships. But, also, it gave me the opportunity to go home and be with my family for Christmas. Surprisingly, Christmas was normal. For once, my family (specifically my parents) and I did not fight about my sexuality. Although I believe it has more to do with a "don't ask, don't tell" denial mentality rather than actual acceptance, it nonetheless, was nice to be a part of the family again.

My friendships with some of my closest friends have seemingly ceased to exist because of romantic relationships, distance, and just generally a change in life priorities. At the same time, though, there has been greater closeness with some people from work and other places.

So, it seems that like me, maybe humanity as a whole works this way. Maybe we need the hard, lonely, sad, dark, and utterly depressing times to get to and appreciate the easy, joyful, loving, light, and happy things in life. I mean, what would be
the point of life otherwise? Some things I think are random and don't happen because of any reasoning. But, aren't some things fated? Destined? Planned?

Then again, why do bad things happen to good people? Why children die before their parents? Why does someone who never smoked a day in their life get lung cancer? Why do people who commit tax fraud and swindle millions upon millions out of their employees get a slap on the wrist, while the same swindled employees get hard time in jail for stealing for their families? Why are good, loving people alone and single? Why?

Perhaps, there are no answers. People are born. die. get cancer. don't get sick. laugh. cry. rich. poor. loved. unloved. People just are.

However, a part of me, the optimistic in me, sometimes wishes life was more like one of those choose your own adventure books. I feel like I've made some incredible mistakes in my past and if I could I would go back and change things. But, then I remember, my mistakes, my lonely Winter, makes me stronger and brings me to that Spring, that glorious Spring, full of child-like wonder and love. So, I just need to remind myself, that I am worth it; I will get through this Winter (with money worries, family issues, and a sad heart) to my Spring. It is out there waiting for me!

So, what do you think? Are you currently in your Winter? or Spring? comments? questions? Leave 'em below! :)

It's like you wrote this for me...

"Where I Stood"

I don't know what I've done
Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run
And honey you know me it's all or none

There were sounds in my head
LIttle voices whispering
That I should go and this should end
Oh and I found myself listening

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

See I thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you ain't leaving without a fight
And I think I am just as torn inside

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

And I won't be far from where you are if ever you should call
You meant more to me than anyone I ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself and so I say to you
This is what I have to do

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
Oh, she who dares to stand where I stood

What I want

Because I can only think about me right now, I want these things. I want to go home and play in the snow. I want to be able to find another job and pay off bills. I want her. I want to see her. I want to kiss her and I want to hold her, and make things better. I'm totally not used to this whole helpless feeling. I just wish I knew how to deal with it all. I'm not good at it. I want to do something to better myself, but I don't know how to start. I want to sit by a cozy fire. I want to eat real food. I want to stay up late tonight and sleep in tomorrow. I want to build a snowman. I want to see my friends on New Years and for there not to be awkwardness/drama. What do you want?

Grey Skies To Blue : A Poem

As I walk down the street, feeling the wind in my hair,
I wish you were with me, instead of over there.
Although we are miles and hours apart,
I can feel you right here, right in my heart.

Today, I'll send happy thoughts over to you.
So, that you can feel me in all that you do.
I'm right next to you, by your side.
Holding your hand through life's crazy ride.

I know you're not one for mushy love songs,
but you've made everything right not wrong.
This seems so real, so right, and so true.
You took away the grey skies and turned them blue.

So blue, blue even in the dead of winter.
You've made me feel like a first-place winner.
You've crashed through my heart, melting the sadness away.
I hope we can always be together, hoping that you will stay.

I may not know what the future holds.
We're a story that's yet to unfold.
I dream that it could be something great.
I believe in things greater than fate.

The older I get

the more I realize, that everything has a time and place and things truly happen for a reason.





Lyrics:
To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to build up,a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time to love, a time to hate
A time for peace, I swear its not too late

You've been a baddddddd pussycat!

Here's proof that some cats are evil. I knew my sister's cat, Kurt (named after deceased rocker Kurt Cobain from Nirvana) had it out for me. XD